Is it possible to avoid depression? What is the secret of cultivating happiness and avoiding periods of unhappiness? To a large extent, we determine our own frame of mind; we shouldn’t feel that we are a helpless victim to depression. Depression is something that we can avoid by cultivating the opposite – happiness.
Here are some tips for avoiding depression
1. Offer goodwill to Others.
If we seek to make others miserable how can we expect to be happy ourselves? If we offer goodwill to other people this creates a powerful positive energy. Focusing on other people’s good qualities can definitely help improve our own state of mind. There is a principle that what we give out, we get back. Therefore, by offering positive energy to, at some time, we will also be the recipient.
2. Learn to Detach from Thoughts
Thoughts play a very significant role in determining our state of mind. If we pursue negative thoughts then we give them greater power and influence over our state of being. However, it is possible to decide which thoughts to allow and which to reject. We have to learn to be vigilant and prevent negative thoughts from taking hold. As soon as we become aware of negative thoughts we should let go of them. We can imagine that we are throwing them out of our mind into a cosmic dustbin.
3. Keep Busy.
If we struggle to detach from negative thoughts we should just throw ourselves into other activities. When we get involved in other activities that we enjoy it takes us out of ourselves. Activity forces us to do something constructive, and does not allow us to dwell on our depressed state of mind.
4. Avoid Feelings of guilt.
If we have made a mistake, harbouring feelings of guilt will not help alleviate the situation. In particular, we are seeking to avoid feelings of guilty for minor events of no significance. Often we have done nothing wrong, but, others seek to make us feel guilty for their bad fortune. Instead of feeling guilty we should seek to concentrate on doing the right thing.
5. Live a Balanced Life.
In life we need to make room for different aspects. If we focus all our time and energy on work then we will have no time for relaxation and cultivating other aspects of our life. If we pursue an unbalanced life unhappiness is more likely to occur.
6. Don’t Base your Happiness solely on other people.
If we expect to gain happiness from another person, at some time, we are bound to be disappointed. If bad relationships end, we should see it as an opportunity to move on. It is no use dwelling on what might have been. It is also a mistake to feel that we can change somebody to match our preferences. If we seek to change a person fundamentally we will just feel frustrated when we fail.
7. Share Problems
Good friendships can offer tremendous help. Especially, if we can have 1 or 2 friends who are able and willing to listen to our problems. Our friends will not be able to solve our problems. However, simply having someone to talk to and share difficulties is a tremendous help in being able to work through our own problems.
8. Cultivate Happiness.
To avoid depression we have to focus on the alternative which is happiness. The problem is that when we are depressed, the idea of happiness seems a million miles away. But, sometimes if we can force a smile or try to be insincerely happy, we can trick the mind and force happiness to descend; and after a while we start to achieve real happiness.
Happiness
Will follow you
If your heart remains
Undisturbed by trifles.
9. Have Low Expectations.
Depression often occurs because our desires remain unfulfilled. The more desires we have, the more likely we are to be disappointed. After disappointment comes a sense of frustration and depression. If we minimise our desires then we will not be prone to disappointment. This does not mean we cannot strive for excellence and achieve things. We definitely should strive to achieve various accomplishments. However, we should try to have an attitude of detachment to the outcome. Nor should we expect people to behave in a certain way.
10. Don’t Dwell On the Negative.
This is the key to avoiding depression. If we focus always on negative things this will eventually filter through into our state of mind. Negativity can be, miserable people, depressing situations and our own negative thoughts. If we want to cultivate happiness, we should seek to avoid depressing situations and depressing people.
Photo By Kedar Misani, Sri Chinmoy Centre Galleries
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“Learn to Detach from Thoughts” is a very useful recommendation for me. Many would want to do this but I find most people have difficulties practicing it. I think a step-by-step meditation technique focused on detaching from negative thoughts will help a lot. Great post!!!
Love & Gratitude,
Tina Su
“http://thinksimplenow.com”>Think Simple. Be Decisive.
It is not a comment but a problem am having leding me to be so much depressed, am requesting for your advice please if possible email the advice via the about email address, will be so happy.
Am having problems with my ex-boyfriend with whom l had a child with 6 years now, we have had misunderstandings ever since when l conceived that child relating mainly to lack of respect by this man to me. I have left this man it coming to a year, l just want to let it go.
The problem now is that deep inside l still love this man but again l know we cant leave together happly because of his bad behaviours, at times he calls me wants me back to his life, but again this same man is other women he is sleeping with, he doesn’t value me at all l want to forget thinking about him but l can’t, at the moment l don’t have anyother man, l feel so much disturbed and depressed, l need your advice please, what can l do?
THANKS FOR HAVING THIS WEBSITE.I AM RECENTLY WORKING AT A TIMESHARES BY OWNER AND IVE COMPLETELY MESSED UP A TASK.I FEEL REALLY GUILTY AND DEPRESSED BECAUSE I WANT TO SHOW THEM THAT I HAVE THE POTENTIAL TO BE A RECEPTIONIST.I’M SO DEPRESSED AND I DONT WANT TO AFFECT MY JOB SO I SEARCHED ON HOW I CAN AVOID BIENG DEPRESSED AND TO NOT THINK ABOUT THE NEVATIVE AND THESE TIPS DEFENETLY WORKED.THANKS ALOT 🙂
These tips are so good. They are helpful and encouraging. I am typically a good person. I have done some things that may not have been nice, but it is very rare. Nonetheless, I have negative person(s) around that just plan to make your life a living hell, but I try to overcome it. The things is, this is not always easy. But I will keep these tips near by because I am a happy person and I will remain this way.
i’ve been married to this wonderful women and unfortunetly i have not been a good husband, now she is very far away and i feel i’ll lose her i just wanted to set things right but since i can’t i’m so depressed. Please send me some adivice. Thanks.
thank you
i am a successful manager 46 years but 2 reach this i am always passing 2 many depressing modes.i like ur tips and i admit my only enjoyment is with my work and when i have problems with my work i get depressed. i surrender 2 negative thoughts .i want u 2 advice me how i train 2 avoid negative thoughts i would like 2 have a hobbey ow would i explore it. Pls dvice because this affecting my relationship with wife and kids.
Thank you thank you so much for the great thoughts which will help to reduce my problems.
What you have just posted on this website, is good advice- to an extent.
There are some things, that you have posted, that makes this “advice” list, slightly contradictory.
Depression is a serious mental issue. I get that you are trying to be helpful, but imagine yourself as someone that had depression, and say you read this. Sure, this would give you an over view, however, imagine reading “have low expectations”
A person who is reading this, who actually has depression, is probably feeling shitty, and saying that, imagine how that person would feel. Put yourself in their shoes. :I
I’m not saying that what you have posted is wrong, but they are such… bold and out there methods.
._.
Just put yourself in a person who actually has depression, a mental illness that is formally diagnosed by a doctor.
But good advice, non the less.
Very commendable tips.!If we sum up all the causes of hurt ,disappointment, unhappiness, and frustration it is having too much expectations. It goes with life and its inseparable as we deal towards ourselves, people around us, and work.We just have to learn how to manage it properly in order to enjoy life. 🙂
My problem is some what different from this case ,I fell depressed when Iam reading books ,meansI ussually going to sleep when Iam reading eventhoghou Ihave taken enogh sleeping before ,please help me what to do by your suggestion.
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Life just sucks sometime…especially when we don’t know how to live it and enjoy it…I get so scared because I’ve been so hurt in my life and I don’t let anyone in my life because I’m scared of getting hurt….I have no frineds I’m super shy at school….I spend my time home with my son …and the only thing that gets stress out of my mind is painting art….I just wish I could laugh more and do the things I want because one day I will die and that will be it for me…. we only live once….
Thanks a lot , I do agree with you… but sometimes in work, there are no tasks and spare time kills me and also makes me depressed …. how can I overcome sparetime at work ? thx alot 🙂