Entries Tagged 'life' ↓
August 2nd, 2010 — life
What is will power? Will power is the ability to do what we set out to do, without being sidetracked by doubt, hesitation and temptation. Will-power is the soul force which enables us to transcend the limitations of our self.
A person without will power is easily swayed and influenced. Without will-power we can feel a helpless victim to circumstances, other people, and our own thoughts.
To develop will power is to develop greater self-control and release our own hidden potential.
How To Develop Will Power
Exercise the Muscle.
Will-power should be seen like a muscle. If we train our muscle it gets stronger. If we don’t it gets weaker. Will power is not a heredity condition. It is something that we can develop.
Clear Focus.
Will power involves being one pointed and achieving a certain goal. If we are not entirely clear what we want to do, it is difficult to focus our will to doing it. When we attempt to do something, we need the co-operation of all parts of ourself. Don’t be in two minds, but decide exactly what you need to do and stick to it.
Will Power For the Positive.
It is better to develop will power for a positive goal, rather than using our will power to negate something.
“The easiest way to use will-power is to take the positive approach. Use will-power to do something positive, not to keep yourself from doing something negative. If we say, “I shall not tell a lie,” that is important. But if we say, “I shall tell the truth,” that will-power is more effective. When we say, “I won’t do it,” already the negative thing has half its power just because we are thinking about it. If we repeat in our mind, “I won’t be jealous,” the word ‘jealous,’ the negative quality that it embodies, ruins our mind and then we do become jealous.”
- Sri Chinmoy (1)
Ignore Silly thoughts.
It is human nature, that when we attempt something, silly thoughts appear in our mind to try and put us off. These thoughts have to be ignored. We have to see them as foreign entities. If we listen and accept every silly thought that comes into our mind, we will have no will power because our hyperactive mind will pull us in many different directions.
Concentration
Concentration and will-power are closely linked. If we develop our concentration which is our ability to remain one-pointed, we are at the same time developing our will power. See: Concentration exercise.
Never Give Up.
Will power doesn’t mean we have to always achieve at our first attempt. If we get pulled off our target, pay no attention and don’t allow despondency to enter. We need to keep trying. Persistence and patience are essential components of will-power.
Make It Easy Not Hard
If you want to give up smoking, avoid situations which encourage the craving. If you want to have the will-power to avoid chocolate, you wouldn’t buy the most tempting chocolates and invite your friends to come and eat them in front of you. Will-power also involves common sense to help us achieve our goal.
Understand Benefits and Costs.
To achieve something we need to understand benefits and costs. If we truly value what we are aiming at then we will develop the perseverance to continue struggling for it.
Use of Will Power
Will-power is one thing, but it also has to be directed in right direction. Napoleon undoubtedly had great will-power, but that doesn’t mean we have to become another Napoleon. Often the most important use of will-power is using it to become a better person. It is to be free of our own limitations fear, doubt and jealousy. This will-power to be happy is definitely worth growing.
Related
Effective Ways to Get Out of A Negative Mindset
(1) Sri Chinmoy Speaks Part 5
Photo Pavitrata Taylor, Sri Chinmoy Centre Galleries.
July 19th, 2010 — life
“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond the winning.”
- Lao Tzu
There are many things we need to do. One of them is letting go of our unfortunate mistakes, habits, thoughts and experiences. At times we also need to let go of other people, we need to move on from the past and look towards the future. If we hang onto the unfortunate experiences of the past, this is what we will carry forward into the present. There is a well known story of the Zen monk who wanted to know why he couldn’t gain enlightenment. His Master replied – how can a full cup be filled up? To fill a cup with honey, we must first empty the water from the cup. It is the same with enlightenment, we have to let go of what is in our mind, for new, enlightening experiences to enter in.
What do we need to Let Go of?
Letting Go of Bad Habits
There are many things that we cling onto out of habit, which really don’t help. Sometimes we have a habit that we don’t really want, but part of us still clings to it. It is like the camel continuing to eat thorns, even though it is causing camel pain. We fail to make a complete break because subtly we have a lingering attachment. If we resolve to get rid of a negative habit like being jealous of other people, we have to make it complete. Just because we always do something doesn’t mean that a) it is a good thing to do b) we are compelled to do it. Look at our daily activities and see what we would be happy to change.
Things we Have No Control of.
Many things happen in life, that we can in no way influence. It may be the behaviour of other people, it may be events in society, even our own government. Having these problems revolve around in our mind will change nothing, except to make us unhappy at our perceived helplessness and misfortune. These are the kind of things we have to let go of. This is not indifference to problems in society, it is just realising what we can and can’t do.
Letting Go of The Past.
To think of the past
Is indeed a painful task.
To carry the past
Is indeed a fruitless burden.
- Sri Chinmoy (1)
Something that has happened in the past we cannot change. If we carry unfortunate experiences around in our mind, it is like a heavy weight that clouds our state of mind and makes life a struggle. To let go of the past, and enable new experiences to enter is the most positive approach. Even if the past is good, we shouldn’t feel that this former experience is the pinnacle of our life. This can breed a complacency and make us just yearn to hold onto the ‘golden days’. We have to keep moving forward looking for an even brighter future.
The Inevitability of Change.
Whether we like it or not, life will unmistakably teach us the inevitability of change. We have no choice but to let go of things. We will lose ou physical capacities; we will lose friends, family, money – anything can be lost at any moment. However, change is not a bad thing if we are cheerful and accept it as part of life. Human nature is to seek improvement and new experiences. If everything were to remain static, we would get bored and life would feel stifled. We would never be able to realise our potential.
Mind’s Preconceptions.
If we analyse our mind and the thoughts that come, we will soon feel there are many things that are good to let go of. Not least, our preconceptions and pre-judgements of other people. Our mind can be very bad at projecting false motives onto other people. If we can let go of these, we will be much happier (and better people)
How to Let Go
It is one thing to know we should let go of thoughts and experiences, but, human nature is to cling onto things, even when it causes suffering and cannot help. Firstly, we have to make a clear decision to let go of our thought / habit. It is no good if part of us wants to let go, but part of us still wants to hold on.
Looking forward.
To let go of the past is much easier when we spend our energies cultivating a better future, living in the present moment. If we are active in a positive way, we don’t have time to dwell on the past.
Don’t Fight Nature.
Nature and life are always in a state of flux. We need to realise this world is fleeting and ephemeral, change is inevitable. But, do we always want to stay exactly where we are? There is nothing to fear about moving forward. Life is nothing if not a journey of discovery.
Real Love / Attachment.
We often mistake love for clinging onto people. But, this is just emotional attachment. Real love is compatible with letting go on an external level. The real, all embracing love, does not have to be confined to certain people and small areas of the past.
Related
(1) Ten Thousand Flower Flames Part 63 by Sri Chinmoy
Photo by Pranlobha, Sri Chinmoy Centre Galleries
June 21st, 2010 — life
What Does it Mean to Be Free?
Having just sat through an insipid world cup performance by my team England, I have realised how my mood can easily be disturbed by 11 football players failing to pass a football ball as well as I expect them to. I mean they were dreadful, but, should I be letting myself be affected by things outside my control? Well the world cup is only every four years, and I will always be a glutton for punishment (by nature I’m an optimist – I can’t help but always think this time we can win). But, football aside, we need to develop an inner freedom, a state of mind which can be free from the innumerable worries and anxieties of life. Real inner freedom is a state where we can remain unaffected by disturbing thoughts and ideas.
Inner Freedom
To Feel Negative Thoughts as Separate Entities.
Socrates once went to a noted sage. The sage told Socrates and his followers that Socrates had all the human limitations of anger, pride and jealousy.
His followers were shocked and interrupted to criticise the sage, saying they saw Socrates as a saint. However, the sage, said, ‘let me finish. It is true that he has all these negative qualities, but Socrates doesn’t let them affect him.’
As we aspire for a better life, human weaknesses will continue crop up. We cannot remain totally unaffected by old thought habits and emotions. However, we don’t have to give our acceptance and full support to these negative thoughts and emotions. We can feel these negative thoughts and emotions as separate to our real self. If we see these thoughts and emotions as separate and outside our self, then we can remain free from there power. We can remain centred in our real self. This is the secret of inner freedom because we can detach from thoughts and emotions that drag us down and round in circles.
We can have all the outer freedom we want to live exactly as we want. But, if we unable to let go of jealousy and insecurity, then we are not free to be inwardly happy; we will be constantly limiting ourself.
To be Free of Desires we Don’t Want.
It is the nature of desire to remain unfulfilled or be disappointed. The more desires we have, the more prone to disappointment we will be. There are still good things to aim for. There is no harm in aspiring to be a better person and to achieve worthwhile goals. But, to limit material desires, and desires from other people lifts a great pressure off our state of mind. If we have innumerable desires we always feel a sense of dissatisfaction until they fulfilled in our own way. We can become a slave of our desires, making us sacrifice worthwhile principles to get what we want. Yet, even when we get our desire, we soon realise it isn’t the secret of inner peace and contentment. Inner freedom is to be the master of our own desire.
To be Free from Peer Pressure
Friends, society and government consciously or unconsciously place expectations on our behaviour, attitude and actions. There is a pressure to conform to certain pre-conceived attitudes. If you look over the past 100-200 years, you can see how concepts of morality and reasonable behaviour are constantly changing. To be free from these subtle pressures is essential to give us our inner peace and enable us to be inwardly free.
To be free from peer pressure doesn’t mean we have to be the natural born rebel, always trying to shock people; this can become it’s own ideology. Having a shocking hairstyle is not the be all and end all or symbol of inner freedom. The real secret is the inner attitude. It is to quietly question prevailing values like materialistic goals; it is to have the self-confidence and inner faith to live as we feel inwardly inspired.
Knowing our Real Self.
“What is false freedom? False freedom is our constant and deliberate acceptance of ignorance and our conscious existence in ignorance. What is real freedom? Real freedom is our conscious awareness of our inner divinity, and our constant inseparable oneness with the Inner Pilot.”
- Sri Chinmoy (1)
To be really free, we have to be able live in our real self. The self that is spontaneous, happy, non-judgemental and cheerful. It is the childlike quality we all have within us. It is this source of human creativity and real joy. We have all felt this at some times in our life. We feel uninhibited and can access that creative aspect of ourselves. We can know this real self through living in the heart – living away from the critical mind; it is something we can access through meditation and contemplation. The irony is this inner freedom requires discipline.
Related
(1) Excerpt from The Tears Of Nation-Hearts by Sri Chinmoy
Photo Tejvan,
June 14th, 2010 — life
We are constantly judging other people, our self and situations. It can feel like life is a constant reality TV show with a panel of judges always in evidence. But, the judgemental nature of the mind, will neither give us peace or happiness. To attain a real inner peace, we have to go far beyond the judgemental game of inferiority and superiority.
Why Be Less Judgemental
We Suffer
When we judge others, it’s hard to not have a feeling (consciously or unconsciously) of superiority / pride. When we judge others we lower our own consciousness.
“If we judge others with our unlit human mind, with the intellectual mind, with the sophisticated mind, the persons whom we judge do not lose an iota of their achievement, of their reality. But we lose. How do we lose? When we start doubting others, we offer something of our own existence to the outer world something of our own reality goes and eventually we become very weak.”
- Sri Chinmoy (1)
We may be Wrong.
When judging others we are often judging only a small part of their nature. It may even be second hand information. We may hear someone’s opinion and take it as gospel. But, who is to say they haven’t put their own slant and perspective on the other person. Even when we seem someone first hand we may misunderstand their motives or inner attitude. We can never know what is going on inside a person. Every is fighting their own battles and trying to be a better person in their own way. We cannot expect every to be at the stage of sainthood in this incarnation.
How would we want to be judged?
When we do something good, of course, we want the whole world to know about it. But, when we do something bad or unfortunate we would really like it to be kept quiet. If we take delight in people’s misfortunes then it is a big mistake, and it is likely to happen to us.
How To Be Less Judgemental
Be Sympathetic
When we see someone doing something wrong, we can feel that this is something we could be doing wrong ourselves. Ironically, when we criticise faults in others, we often have the same faults ourselves. If we remember we are as prone to misjudgement and doing the wrong thing then it gives us more compassion and understanding.
Be supportive not critical.
Judging others rarely helps to change others behaviour for the better. Being supportive can change.
Concentrate on Being Happy.
When we get bogged down in judging others, we wont gain much happiness. Happiness comes from enjoying the good things in life, not in giving sermons on the failings of the world.
Look Upon People as an Extended Family.
If someone close to us does something wrong we are more willing to forgive and see their better qualities. When judging friends or work colleagues see them as an extended part of your self / family, this will give us a more sympathetic approach.
Being Right Isn’t the Most Important Thing.
In judging others, there is a strong desire to be right and show others as wrong. But life isn’t all about being right. It’s about quietly making a positive contribution.
Judge Only Yourself.
“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye” Matthew 7:3
If we have to judge, why not judge yourself and see how you can improve yourself as a person? Don’t make the mistake of blaming your difficulties on others. Difficulties come from some defect in our own character.
Dealing With Judgemental People.
Some people are very judgemental. They have a habit of making us feel small / guilty. It also encourages us to be judgemental in response. We either seek to defend ourselves or start judging others – joining in their game of judging people.
It can also be difficult to disagree with judgemental people, as they often can have deep conviction in their beliefs.
The best way of dealing with judgemental people is not to directly challenge them, but, allow them to go their way, whilst we maintain our quiet approach. Don’t worry about having the last word or defending yourself. If they are really making unfair criticisms of friends, you can always point to their good qualities. But, you are unlikely to change their nature so don’t expect too much.
Related
(1) Warriors of the Inner World by Sri Chinmoy
Photo Top, Tejvan, New College, Oxford
June 3rd, 2010 — life
Sometimes it feels quite easy to write what you want you should do. In fact, when you write everything down the task of self-improvement looks quite easy! But, alas, knowing what to do is only part of the problem. Even when we have resolved what we want to do, part of our human nature can cling to its old habits, emotions and thought patterns. Even when we no longer want to pursue a certain emotion, it still can come to the fore despite our mental rejection.
Sometimes, it can feel like there are two parts to our self. There is the one positive part aspiring for a better consciousness. At times we glimpse this and feel a sincere happiness. At other times, we can feel overpowered by some undesirable aspect of our nature.
The first thing to bear in mind, is that everyone has this experience of making a few steps forward and a few steps backwards. It is necessary to accept our transformation takes time. – See: Changing yourself by accepting yourself. It is often just when we think we have made great progress and overcome some emotion like anger, that it re-appears out of nowhere and takes us by surprise. Human nature does take a long time to transform. But, when we experience the stubbornness of our own nature, it is important to bear in mind a few things.
- Don’t be depressed or mad with yourself for a temporary relapse. By becoming depressed over our weaknesses, we only strengthen them. A feeling of guilt or despondency is also very unhelpful. If we see it is a inevitable step in our self improvement then it loses much of its power. See: Avoiding Self Pity
- At the same time, we must distance ourselves from this emotion. We shouldn’t give it any mental support. By distancing ourselves from our negative emotion, it helps us to detach and slowly the experience will dissipate.
- A quiet but firm resolve to overcome any difficulty is the most effective way of quickly overcoming them. We should avoid elation at a good experience and despondency at depressing experiences. But, we do need flexibility and a willingness to give up old thought patterns and habitual responses.
I enjoy peace
Only when I am not afraid
Of changing my stubborn mind.
- Sri Chinmoy (1)
- Don’t Over Analyse / focus on your Negative Qualities. The best way to overcome negative qualities is simply to aspire for more light and concentrate on doing the right thing.
- Any experience is an opportunity to transcend the quality we want to. We need to maintain a careful balance between self criticism and self encouragement
Related
(1) Excerpt from Peace-Blossom-Fragrance, Part 1 by Sri Chinmoy
photo Tejvan, Sri Chinmoy Centre Galleries.
May 10th, 2010 — life
It is often said that human nature is as stubborn as a mule. It is said, you can’t change the spots on a Dalmatian, nor can you change the stubbornness of the human mind. But, change is not only possible, it is inevitable at some stage in our evolution. To change ourselves is certainly the greatest challenge that we can take up, it is also the most rewarding activity that we can do.
How To Change?
We Need to Want To Change.
We have to feel the necessity of changing our nature. If we don’t want to change, how can we expect the universe to do it for us when we are sleeping in the land of nod? If we understand the benefits of changing, half the battle is won. This is essentially a choice to be happy rather than unhappy. If we cling to jealousy, despair and self-pity we will only bring unhappiness onto ourselves. If we wish to be genuinely happy, we have to understand the necessity of overcoming our weakness and undivine qualities.
The Inner Cry
We can’t change human nature with a proud and haughty attitude. When we inwardly cry for our nature’s transformation it becomes possible. To inwardly cry for a better life, is to sincerely reject our wrong thoughts, and wrong state of mind. The inner cry is never an ostentatiously display of emotion. It is a private aspiration, it is our real humility coming to the fore. When we inwardly cry for change, we let go of our pride and self-sufficiency. It is in this state that we will feel sweetness and softness; we will see the futility of our self-imposed lofty pride and unhappiness.
Persistence and Determination
Many people know what to do,
But few care how to do,
And fewer still dare to do.
- Sri Chinmoy (1)
We cannot change human nature overnight. We need persistence. We need to constantly reject the onset of negative thoughts as often as they come to us. We need to remember constantly what we want to change into. As soon as we start taking the wrong approach we need to check ourselves and put us back on track.
Play Tricks
If all fails, we can play tricks on ourselves. Even if we are insincere we can smile at others. We can try to offer something to other people. We may feel that we are being insincere, and we don’t really mean it. But, it is much better to offer an insincere smile than a sincere growl. We may start off with insincerity, but, we may end up believing our own tricks. Our insincere smile will turn into a sincere and genuine happiness.
Don’t Brood.
The worst stumbling block to change is to brood on our shortcomings, limitations and misdeeds. Our mind has remarkable capacity to heighten and magnify our problems. Before we know it, a small problem has magnified into the pinnacle of despair. However, this is only strengthening our ego; it is only strengthening our weaknesses and problems. It is always better to be active, to talk, to do something positive. When we are in a negative frame of mind it is not the time to be silent and lethargic.
Don’t Let Your Pride Hold You Back.
Often part of us wants to change, but, there is a part of us which consciously or subconsciously wants to hold on to the undivine part of us. There is a subtle pride in maintaining our grimness, our misery. We feel that to be happy is to humble our ego. The problem is we come to identify ourselves with this part of us which is holding us back. If we see our own folly it becomes easier to let go of it. Again the key is we need to want to change.
Be Selfless.
It may be difficult to change for ourselves, but, it is easier to change when we think of others. If we love people we will want to offer something positive and not something negative which holds them back and makes them suffer too.
Related
(1) Excerpt from Twenty-Seven Thousand Aspiration-Plants, Part 151
photo: Pranlobha, Sri Chinmoy Centre Galleries
May 4th, 2010 — life
To make spiritual progress, certain qualities are indispensable. It is not enough to buy a few books and find the right spiritual path. You can surround yourself with the best wisdom and enlightened souls, but if we cling to our pride, stubbornness or a distorted view of reality, our progress can be worse than useless.
These are some Qualities essential for Self Improvement.
Honesty With Yourself.
There is a saying ‘The Truth Hurts’. In one sense the truth will hurt our ego or pride. But, to make progress it is essential we can be honest with ourselves. This means we are perfectly clear on our own inner motives. We may be able to fool other people we are acting selflessly, we may even be able to fool ourselves, but, if we can fool ourselves how can we make progress?
“Try to make yourself honest. If you become honest, then rest assured there will be one rascal less in the world.”
- Thomas Carlyle
For example, maybe we are unhappy with someone close to us. If we are honest, we will recognise that part of us is jealous of their success and / or feel insecure that we are no longer so valuable. However, the nature of our mind is that we tend to ignore our own emotions of jealousy and concentrate on justifying why they are bad and holding us back. We might not like to admit we are jealous because we know we shouldn’t harbour such feelings. But, until we admit we are feeling jealous we will be unable to overcome it.
Don’t Practise Endless Self-Justification
Self Justification is an almost endless habit of human nature. It stems from the desire to protect our status, social recognition and ego. When things are going wrong, we try to blame other people, external situations, anything but take responsibility for our own mistakes or wrong attitude.
If there is a real misunderstanding, then clearing it up can be helpful. The problem comes when we expend so much energy on justifying our wrong actions we almost come to believe we haven’t done anything wrong and so we effectively perpetuate our wrong attitudes and thoughts.
I am at once a fool and a rogue
When I blame others
For my own misdeeds.
- Sri Chinmoy (1)
This is closely related to being honest with ourselves.
Willingness to Change.
The nature of the mind is that it always likes to think it is right. Whatever idea / thoughts come into the mind, we always think we are right and everyone else is wrong. This can also breed a sense of self-righteousness and moral superiority.
We have to be very careful with out mental judgements. When we judge a situation or other people, we have to be aware we are only seeing part of the situation / part of the problem. The mind latches onto a few mistakes, but we need to remember the good qualities of the person. If we use our heart more we would be much less judgemental.
We also have to bear in mind, we may be wrong, or at least partly wrong. And where we are wrong, we have to be willing to change. To cling to misplaced ideas just because we don’t like to admit we are wrong, may have a place in the political world, but, in the spiritual world, it is just self-defeating.
“The man who never alters his opinion is like standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind.”
~William Blake
Be Careful of the Ego.
One of the main aspects of self-improvement is diminishing the importance of our egoism. At the start we cannot eliminate our ego completely. But, we can be aware of the ego’s demands for name and fame. We try to be less influenced by the ego and be more humble. But, the ego is tricky, instead of being proud of worldly accomplishments, the ego can subtly become proud of its spiritual achievements – ‘O how spiritual I am! We may not say it outwardly, but, part of us is feeling that. In a way a the spiritual ego is much worse than an ordinary ego. When we become proud of our spirituality / religion, we become self-righteousness with a subtle feeling of moral superiority. We have to be very careful of the ego’s emotions and intentions and make sure it doesn’t sneak in an unexpected guise.
Patience and Persistence.
For thousands of years, man has been trying to perfect his human nature. Some spiritual paths suggest the cycle of perfection can take hundreds or thousands of human incarnations. Whether we believe in reincarnation or not, we have to admit that transforming human nature is a long and gradual path. Of course, it is not all difficulty and problems; it can be very rewarding to make progress, but at the same time we have to have patience and a steady perseverance. There is nothing to be gained by an impatient desire to expect instant perfection.
Cheerfulness.
When we are happy we can make progress. If we cling to unhappiness and dissatisfaction, progress will remain a far cry. Cheerfulness requires a good balance in life. It involves having a childlike attitude. Sometimes, part of us feels attracted to suffering; we subtly hold onto a feeling of being wronged, suffering. This can be very pervasive and difficult to get rid of. But, we need to be cheerful.
“For joy and not for sorrow earth was made.”
- Sri Aurobindo, Savitri
Related
(1) Excerpt from Twenty-Seven Thousand Aspiration-Plants, Part 222 by Sri Chinmoy
April 26th, 2010 — life
(An active volcano – New Zealand – from www.worldharmonyrun.org)
In April, I travel to Jamaica, Queens, New York for a meditation retreat with my friends in the Sri Chinmoy Centre. It is a great opportunity to forget work, and the usual business concerns and spend time meditating and other spiritual activities. As I was preparing to return home, I heard news of flights cancelled and an erupting Volcano. My first thoughts were – that will soon pass, I mean who has ever heard of airplane flights been cancelled because of erupting volcanoes? But, as it got closer to my departure day, it dawned on me that Mother Nature is never bound by our fixed routines and expectations.
Suddenly all your plans, routines and expectations are tossed aside and you are left with a very different experience. I was fortunate, in that I had a nice place I could continue to stay and many friends around me were in the same boat, so to speak. But, the nature of our mind is to dislike any disruptions to our plans and routines; and the worst is not knowing what if anything will happen.
What can we do when our world is turned upside down?
Keep Things In Perspective
Not being able to get to work on time, is not the end of the world. Temporary material discomforts will make us appreciate a return to normality. If we can keep things in perspective it will avoid unnecessary despair. Even the worst experiences are not for ever. It is even more important to avoid speculating on an apocalyptic turn of events. Sometimes things look bleak in the present time, but, turn out to be less bad than feared.
Of course, when you’ve spent three hours trying to get through to Virgin Atlantic on a cold pay phone, on some New York side street, it’s much easier to talk of detachment and keeping things in perspective than actually practise it. But, nevertheless, we do need to try and be detached.
Comfort and Progress
Sometimes discomfort can bring unexpected qualities forward. It can give people opportunity for self-giving and concern for others. Severe challenges give us an opportunity to make progress by forcing us out of a comfort zone. When life is easy and predictable we can become passive and more easily bored. I’m not saying I would ever choose to be stranded in the middle of nowhere, with no means of getting home. But, when difficult experiences come, they can be turned to a useful and beneficial experience so long as we don’t panic and concentrate on the negatives.
An unavoidable necessity
Can quite often be
An unexpected opportunity.
by Sri Chinmoy (1)
Remain Cheerful.
Don’t feel guilty or frustrated about something you have no control over. It’s tempting to start blaming airline staff for somehow being unable to control the eruption of a volcano. An event like a volcanic eruption merely shows that there will always be things in life over which we have absolutely no control. We can’t stop a volcano, we can only stop our depressed thoughts.
If we can’t return home because of some event beyond your control, it is absurd to start feeling guilty, even if we have an unsympathetic boss.
If we can remain cheerful and positive in a crisis, it will be a source of strength to others. Often thinking of others, is the best way to stay positive and cheerful ourselves. It prevents us becoming too introspective.
Related
(1) Excerpt from Ten Thousand Flower-Flames, Part 93
April 1st, 2010 — life
How To Become A Better Person (in under 300 words)
Think of other people. Consider how you can make others happy and encourage them to do the right thing. Spend time to appreciate their good qualities and boost their self-esteem.
Don’t act for selfish motives. Don’t seek to gain at the expense of others. Don’t speak ill of friends for the motive of impressing other people.
Don’t waste time in seeking praise. Learn to let go of your ego. Humility does not mean putting yourself down. It means being content with what you are, without external praise / blame.
Never be jealous of others’ success or happiness. Learn to be happy through the well being of others. If others do good things, feel it is partly your achievement.
Don’t be attached to a negative frame of mind. As frequently as necessary, let go of negative thoughts. Don’t brood and be despondent. Be wary often the ego is involved in moods of despair and unhappiness. Cultivate cheerfulness.
Smile. If nothing else try to smile when meeting others.
Be enthusiastic in what you do. Whatever you find yourself doing, try to be enthusiastic and positive. Even the smallest act done with love and enthusiasm can make a difference.
Don’t force your opinions on other people. Also, listen patiently to others, but at the same time don’t be swayed by what other people think you should do. Test their advice against your inner wisdom.
Inner Peace Take time to find the inner peace and inner joy that is part of your real nature, but often hidden under the layers of our mental imaginings.
Listen to the promptings of the heart. Be sceptical of the cold judgements of the mind.
Better to make mistakes than to sit idle.
Don’t complain, make a difference.
Related
Photo: Sri Chinmoy Centre Gallery
March 16th, 2010 — life
Conquer the angry man by love.
Conquer the ill-natured man by goodness.
Conquer the miser with generosity.
Conquer the liar with truth.
The Dhammapada
Everyone at some time wants to change the world. It is a noble ideal to leave the world in a better place than we found it, but how can we actually change the world?
When asked about how to change the world, great sages often reply by saying – first you must change yourself.
“Everyone thinks of
Changing the world, but no one thinks of
Changing himself.”
-Leo Tolstoy
Knowing one’s true self is to be in our highest consciousness. It is to be free of egoism, pride and selfishness. To know our highest self is to experience the oneness of creation. If we really see others as part of our extended self – how can we not be more loving to others and the world?
How To Change the World
“Try not to change the world. You will fail. Try to love the world. Lo, the world is changed. Changed forever.”
- Sri Chinmoy
There are different ways to change the world. Some feel the necessity for political action, some feel the need for humanitarian aid. Some feel the need to convince others through word and speech. Some feel the necessity for a spiritual approach. All ways can have their value. This is a look at how to change the world from a spiritual perspective.
The Smallest Acts of Love
“Without love, deeds, even the most brilliant, count as nothing.”
- St Therese of Lisieux
We are apt to think in terms of what we have actually achieved. We are results oriented and are impatient to see the fruits of our action. Then when we fail to see any change, we become impatient and frustrated. The spiritual approach is to aspire to do the right thing with the best motive and then be detached from the results.
From a spiritual perspective it is not what we achieve, but, the spirit with which we do it. If we wish to change the world for the better, act selflessly without a mixed motive of worldly gain. Our honest endeavour will make much more difference.
Be The Example Rather than The Missionary.
Perfect health, sincerity, honesty, straightforwardness, courage, disinterestedness, unselfishness, patience, endurance, perseverance, peace, calm, self control are all things that are taught infinitely better by example than by beautiful speeches
- Sri Aurobindo
Some people want to change the world from the comfort of their armchair or barstool. All they think is necessary is to tell the world where it is going wrong and what they need to do to put it right. If the world could be put right through a quick gossip and criticism of the world, the world would be perfect along time ago. Talking about what others need to do is fine, but doesn’t actually achieve anything. What we can do, is to be what we are aspiring for. We don’t have to convince others to change the world, they will take real inspiration from our transformed lives. When we are in a good consciousness, we automatically uplift others. If we are miserable and in a bad consciousness how can we hope to make the world a better place?
We can change the world,
But not improve it,
If we do not have peace.
- Sri Chinmoy
For every speech about the failings of the world, if only we good do one positive deed.
Appreciate Others
It is our ego which makes us think that it is we who can change the world. Actually we can do nothing on our own. It is only when there is a sense of shared responsibility, a feeling of brotherhood – that humanity will make real progress. To appreciate the best in others, is the best way to encourage, and inspire them to continue doing the right thing.
Often we have the temptation to change the world through the path of criticism and condemnation. But, there is another way. The way of encouragement; it is a way that people are much more receptive to.
Looking For Friends Not Enemies.
The deepest instinct of humanity is to befriend fellow man. How much joy we can get from offering our hospitality and good will to a stranger who passes by. When we think of other people, other nations, we always have a choice. Do we look upon them with our suspicious and fearful mind? Do we look on them as potential enemies? or do we look for their good qualities and see them as potential friends?
Sometimes the simplest approaches are the most effective ways of changing the world.
Also, it depends what we mean by changing the world. Some feel changing the world, can only involve some different political system, greater material well being. This is true to some extent. But, changing the outer forms is only part of the equation. We also need to change the consciousness of society. If we don’t change ourselves, if we don’t bring more peace into our own lives – how can we expect our institutions and politicians to become better.
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Photo: Pavitrata
