Entries Tagged 'happiness' ↓

We all know we should be kind to animals and considerate of other people. But, are we actually kind to ourself? If you regularly find that you are beating yourself up or are plagued by guilt, it is worth making an effort to be a bit kinder to yourself. Here are some ideas so that you offer a bit of support for your good self.

The Past is Dust

‘The Past is Dust’ is one of the favourite sayings of my Spiritual teacher, Sri Chinmoy.

“I always say the past is dust. By thinking of it and brooding over it we cannot change the past or free ourselves from guilt. If we have done something wrong, it is past. Let us think of the immediate future and allow it to grow into the immediacy of today.” [1]

When we live in the past, we become plagued by regrets and guilt. By constantly reliving the past, we cannot change what has gone before. If we have made mistakes in the past, we should not feel that this is our permanent reality. Focus instead, on the present moment and see how you can improve and go forward. It is only by focusing on the present and doing the right thing, that we can learn from the past.

Do One Thing at a Time

We have all tried to juggle several things at once. We also know how stressful and difficult this is. Sometimes when we try to do several things at once, we give ourselves an exaggerated feeling of self importance. However, don’t pile pressure on yourself; value simplicity and do one thing at a time. When you focus on only your current activity, you are not only being kind to yourself; but, also will be able to do things much more effectively.

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Happiness is an elusive bird that we all wish to catch. Consciously or unconsciously we are striving for happiness in both our inner and outer lives; but, what is that really gives us happiness? If we can know the source of permanent and abiding happiness we can help to make it a reality.

Happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.

- Nathaniel Hawthorne:

Self Giving

It is a tendency of the mind to feel that happiness is in the fulfilment of our desires and pleasing our self. However, when we pursue our own selfish interests, happiness remains strangely elusive. Through self giving we can learn the real art of happiness. Self giving is an unconditional offering to others. Through self giving we enlarge our sense of self; self-giving helps us to identify with a larger, vaster consciousness. It is through self giving that we can learn the true meaning of oneness with others. Oneness is another name for love. If we feel others as part of our own self, is this not real love? It is this expansion of consciousness that is a source of abiding happiness. It is not the selfish human love that demands and expects from others.

I am very happy
Because I have conquered myself
And not the world.

I am very happy
Because I have loved the world
And not myself.

- Sri Chinmoy

Peace of Mind

Peace of mind means that we are at peace with ourself. Peace of mind means that we are not striving and pushing to be something we are not. To have peace of mind we need to be able to control our thoughts; it is only our own thoughts that can rob us of peace mind. If we depend upon the appreciation and respect of others, we will never have peace of mind. To make peace of mind a permanent reality we need to control our thoughts and think of others, not just our own self.

Gratitude

Gratitude is cheerful acceptance. Gratitude brings to the fore our best positive qualities. If we can have a sincere feeling of gratitude for even the smallest of events we are taking the positive cheerful frame of mind. If we have no gratitude we develop a feeling of self sufficiency. This self sufficiency creates feelings of both pride and insecurity. Gratitude is the most effective remedy for these emotions. In gratitude we give due value to others and also the natural wonders of the world.

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Is it possible to avoid depression? What is the secret of cultivating happiness and avoiding periods of unhappiness? To a large extent, we determine our own frame of mind; we shouldn’t feel that we are a helpless victim to depression. Depression is something that we can avoid by cultivating the opposite – happiness.

Here are some tips for avoiding depression

1. Offer goodwill to Others.

If we seek to make others miserable how can we expect to be happy ourselves? If we offer goodwill to other people this creates a powerful positive energy. Focusing on other people’s good qualities can definitely help improve our own state of mind. There is a principle that what we give out, we get back. Therefore, by offering positive energy to, at some time, we will also be the recipient.

2. Learn to Detach from Thoughts

Thoughts play a very significant role in determining our state of mind. If we pursue negative thoughts then we give them greater power and influence over our state of being. However, it is possible to decide which thoughts to allow and which to reject. We have to learn to be vigilant and prevent negative thoughts from taking hold. As soon as we become aware of negative thoughts we should let go of them. We can imagine that we are throwing them out of our mind into a cosmic dustbin.

3. Keep Busy.

If we struggle to detach from negative thoughts we should just throw ourselves into other activities. When we get involved in other activities that we enjoy it takes us out of ourselves. Activity forces us to do something constructive, and does not allow us to dwell on our depressed state of mind.

4. Avoid Feelings of guilt.

If we have made a mistake, harbouring feelings of guilt will not help alleviate the situation. In particular, we are seeking to avoid feelings of guilty for minor events of no significance. Often we have done nothing wrong, but, others seek to make us feel guilty for their bad fortune. Instead of feeling guilty we should seek to concentrate on doing the right thing.

5. Live a Balanced Life.

In life we need to make room for different aspects. If we focus all our time and energy on work then we will have no time for relaxation and cultivating other aspects of our life. If we pursue an unbalanced life unhappiness is more likely to occur.

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